December 1, 2006
Home is Not Here
(It Never Was)
by Jenn Joshua, 16
The last bag is packed, the last zipper shut. I lean back on my heels and look at the room I’m about to leave. What was it…three, four days ago that we got here? Maybe less. It seems like just yesterday. I stand to my feet, pull the heavy backpack onto my shoulder and inch backwards towards the door. Maybe next time I should bring a piece of furniture, something to make the room look more…
“Time to leave!” a voice calls from downstairs. One fleeting glance is all I’m entitled to before I close the door behind me.
I shouldn’t be too worried. We’ll be back next week.
Six hours, and two cramped legs later, I open the door to my other room – my smaller, but certainly more personalized room. The backpack slides to the floor with a heavy thump. I won’t bother to unpack most of the essentials – five days can slip by so fast.
In case you’ve not guessed already, my family is moving. Again. I love moving: it’s an op
portunity to clean out the closet, clean out the old life, make way for all things new – and it’s exciting every time. What is not exciting is finding the house where God wants you to be, and then having Him keep a restraining hand on your shoulder, so to speak, by not granting the immediate sale of your current house.
There is an agony associated with watching someone leave your house after a showing, wondering if you prayed hard enough for them to like it, wondering if you prayed with the right words, asked God for the right things, asked with the right motives. When nothing happens week after week, it’s very hard to accept the fact that God sometimes says simply: “Wait.”
Be still and know that He is God, right?
Right.
What’s right is not always easy.
Someday, I know that we will be able to settle down in our new house. Someday my heart will not be in two places, or caught somewhere between. Someday my family will look back and say, “Praise the Lord for letting us sell that house. We thought it would never happen, but He is faithful.”
This desert place in our lives, this valley called “Waiting” has taught me a lesson I should have learned years ago: We are pilgrims, wanderers in a strange land. We have no true home but that which is in Heaven. We are visitors; we are sojourners. We are just passing through.
Someday we will be in our true home, but for now, we do our duty and look forward to that day.
My earthly possessions may be in Maryland, my heart may be in Virginia, but my citizenship is in Heaven.
Bio: Jenn is 16 and a new Real Teen Faith staff member. She loves to write! Her
other interests range from singing and nutrition to exercising and developing
her own vegetarian recipes. Visit her blog at www.DifferentKindofFree.blogspot.com.
Jade W. says:
Hi Jenn,
Great first post! I’ll be praying that your family’s house sells! Keep hanging on, girl!
your friend,
Jade W.
Jack says:
This is amazing!!! I can completely relate because my family moved recently. I hope there’s more like this again soon! Awesome stuff I’m going to bookmark the blog.
Alex Dwyer says:
it’s been a long time since i’ve been on here so its cool to find even more cool variety now! i’m also proud to say that i know jenn!!
Kayla Morrison says:
Where’d you find this one?! Jen’s ausome! lol! Is she gonna do more?
T. Suzanne Eller says:
Jenn is awesome! I’m inviting several teens to join me as staff, hoping to find aspiring writers, but also teens who want to share their faith out loud, you know? Jenn definitely does that. : )
Anonymous says:
I think it would actually be fun too get to move and travel alot. i guess though it would be hard to do it in the midst of not being able to sell a house or something though.
Jun Fretalla says:
I keep coming back to this one so I felt like I should say what I thought. This is realy cool. If I actually ever get around to start my blog, I’d like to get in touch with Jen and have her write devotional like this one. Is that fair to ask? Idon’t want to take your writer!